AOBG – Page 209 – All Outta Bubble Gum

Wolverine And His Amazing Super-Buddies Part IV: The Beginning

September 15, 2009 by Rant

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009): Breakdown by Rantbo Wolverine gets his fourth movie following his adventures of screaming at and beating up various other Mutant cameos. [THE EXECUTION] In an attempt to hold onto the rights for their dismally bad movie franchise, FOX has released yet another X-Men oriented movie for the droves of … Read moreWolverine And His Amazing Super-Buddies Part IV: The Beginning

American Force Of The Avenging Ninja

July 18, 2023September 14, 2009 by kain424

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] Avenging Force (1986): Breakdown by Rutledal A retired martial arts expert/army intelligence agent becomes the target of a racist organization after saving a senator’s life. [THE EXECUTION] Between American Ninja and American Ninja 2, Michael Dudikoff and director Sam Firstenberg decided to make a less ninja-themed martial arts action movie. This was it. … Read moreAmerican Force Of The Avenging Ninja

Blood and Murder-Boners

September 13, 2009 by Rant

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] Blood And Bone (2009): Breakdown by Rantbo Michael Jai White ruins mother fuckers with martial arts. Not their day, not their careers—them. [THE EXECUTION] In the future, I am happy to say, I will now be able to mention a 3rd movie when recommending an awesome illegal, high-stakes street fighting flick. BLOOD AND … Read moreBlood and Murder-Boners

Legacy Of Rage (1986) Killcount

May 20, 2023September 10, 2009 by kain424

Legacy Of Rage (1986)

Starring Brandon Lee and Hoi Mang

Masters Of The Loincloth

September 9, 2009 by Rant

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] Masters of the Universe (1987): Breakdown by Rantbo Dolph Lundgren is He-Man. A man so manly, He must have Man in his name. [THE EXECUTION] The film opens with an epically nonsensical exposition and while it makes absolutely no fucking sense—it is one of the most awesome God Damned things I’ve ever heard … Read moreMasters Of The Loincloth

Michael Dudikoff Killcounts

November 13, 2024September 8, 2009 by kain424

Michael Dudikoff’s killcounts.

Big House, U.S.A.

June 22, 2023September 8, 2009 by kain424

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] Big House, U.S.A. (1955): Breakdown by Kain424 A kidnapping and ransom plan gone awry lands a man in prison, where he meets up with hooligans who help him escape to further their own ends. [THE EXECUTION] For a film made in the bright, post-World War II days of the 1950s, Big House, U.S.A. … Read moreBig House, U.S.A.

Cranktastic!

September 4, 2009 by kain424

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] Crank (2006): Breakdown by Kain424 A man is injected with a drug that will kill him if he stops producing adrenaline. He has to kill the man who essentially killed him and kill this man before he is actually killed. The movie is actually crazier than that sentence. [THE EXECUTION] When I first … Read moreCranktastic!

Getaway The Peckinpahway

September 2, 2009 by Rant

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] The Getaway (1972): Breakdown by Rantbo Steve McQueen sneers, steals and shoots shit with a 12-gauge. Runaway, reload, repeat. [THE EXECUTION] To make a truly great film, it has to be understood by all those involved in the making, the job isn’t complete with a killer screenplay. The truly hard part is, HOW … Read moreGetaway The Peckinpahway

Models of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Aztec Gold

August 30, 2009 by Rant

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003): Breakdown by Rantbo Johnny Depp is sexy—Arrrrr! [THE EXECUTION] Mystery and excitement abound in this thrilling high-seas pirate adventure, based on one of Walt Disney’s most beloved theme park rides!—And it’s sentences like that in the original add campaigns and reviews that … Read moreModels of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Aztec Gold