Rant here, welcoming you dear viewers to the month of Luv, Groundhogs and White Guilt: February. One month down, on our journey to 2011, and I’m sorry to say that it was pretty lack-luster here at AOBG. Having come down with a cold, a week-or-so in, I lost a lot of time and as such, failed to make good on several promises I made in our last update. Most noticeably, the lack of any Bond Breakdowns, and the no-showing of the enigmatic Video Game Breakdown. The former of which, I plan on rectifying this month with a quite timely 007 entry to be posted toward the end of Febs. However, the latter issue, I’m sorry to say, is now off the agenda completely. As it proved to be too much effort, for too little payoff. So, at least for now, I’ll be sticking to Action flicks and Album reviews.
Alright, enough with the personal bullshit, onto the website. Here in America, as most of you know, February is Black History Month. Originally started back in the 1920’s by some historian as a way of saying, “Our bad for the whole slavery thing”, and chosen for the second calender month as it marked two birthdays of influential Americans that changed the social ties of our country, Abe Lincoln and Frederick Douglass (read as: it was the shortest possible month). It has since become a kind-of half-hearted celebration of all things hip and cool. Including the B-Day of yours truly. And we here at AOBG will be doing our part in celebrating our Nubian brothers and sisters by Breaking-Down a slew of new and classic Blaxploitation Action movies.
Kain: The Blaxploitation genre sprung out from the Civil Rights movement, with the ideal of creating strong black characters almost always fighting back against oppressive whites. These films were usually defined by their exaggerated violence and sexuality and often dealt with drugs and gang conflicts.
Why are a couple of white, jive-talkin’, crackajacks like us doing it? Well, like Rant said, it’s Black History Month. Really, it’s kind of perfect. And while this may seem like a backhanded compliment, we really do enjoy exploitative films in all their dirty glory over here at AOBG. So we’re here to celebrate February with all the pimpmobiles, “honkies”, funk music, and gun-toting brothas you can shake your pimp cane at.
Rant: Starting in a couple days, with one the first, and greatest. So pick your fro, throw your fist in the air and bitch slap a jive turkey, ‘cuz it’s on, brothers.
—————————————————————————————————————————————————
DO YOU GOTS WHAT IT TAKES!?
Do you have the drive to write mediocre, snarky commentary for Action films, the likes of which the general populous couldn’t care less about!? Are you willing to sacrifice your freetime for no pay and practically zero feedback!? Do you long for your hard work and cynicism to be featured on our main page, where it is likely to be seen by close to a dozen people!? If you answered yes, to any of those questions, you sir or madam (highly unlikely) are a ballsy hero and need only to submit a Breakdown on our forum for our review and your wildest dreams may indeed come true… If, of course, we think it’s up to par. Oh, and you provide your own movie screencaps. We are WAY too lazy to be doing that bullshit for anyone else but ourselves.
—————————————————————————————————————————————————
Happy Groundhogs Day, Pointless Consumerist Love Day & B-Day To Jane Seymour (you foxy bitch)
Thanks for reading ~TEAM AOBG
Any questions, comments or requests you may have, please let us know. Responses are guaranteed via our Forum, be they private or posted on our update/conversation thread, The Meat Grinder. Or, email us at allouttabubblegum@yahoo.com .
—————————————————————————————————————————————————