{"id":1300,"date":"2009-07-13T02:48:32","date_gmt":"2009-07-13T08:48:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.allouttabubblegum.com\/main\/?p=1300"},"modified":"2009-07-13T02:48:32","modified_gmt":"2009-07-13T08:48:32","slug":"battle-creek-bore","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/battle-creek-bore\/","title":{"rendered":"Battle Creek Bore"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/h2>\n

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

The Big Brawl <\/strong>a.k.a. Battle Creek Brawl (1980): Breakdown by Kain424<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n

In an alternate 1930s America, where Chinese men can become wealthy doctors and date Caucasian women without it causing a stir, Jackie Chan must enter a fighting tournament to win back his brother’s kidnapped mail-order wife.\u00a0 Also, there’s a roller derby for some reason.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

[THE EXECUTION]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

Here lies an interesting little film, made back when the Kung Fu craze began by Bruce Lee<\/strong> was finally dying down.\u00a0 Jackie Chan<\/strong> had become a rather big star in his native China, and was now set to move to the international scene.\u00a0 The director, and much of the crew, from Enter The Dragon<\/strong><\/a> was hired by Warner Brothers <\/em>to make it all happen.\u00a0 Unfortunately, Jackie Chan<\/strong> was not Bruce Lee<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Even in China, Chan’s films floundered when they attempted to match the serious tone of Lee’s movies.\u00a0 Lee’s films were less about style than drama and power.\u00a0 Chan, who had worked with Lee in both Fist Of Fury<\/strong><\/a> and Enter The Dragon<\/a><\/strong>, made lighter films, full of comic relief.\u00a0 Instead of the flexed power of Lee, Chan was fast, acrobatic, and rhythmic.\u00a0 So to watch The Big Brawl<\/strong> is an interesting experience, both fun and sad.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

The biggest flaw in this film is not, however, that the film makers want Chan to be Lee, but that the comedy is simply underdone.\u00a0 In a film that is apparently aware of Jackie’s comic ability, there are many jokes that just go nowhere.\u00a0 For instance, when Kwan’s brother’s wife is switched with a bubblegum-chewing prostitute, you’d expect all sorts of fun hijinks, but it is never mentioned again.\u00a0 This sort of thing goes on and on throughout the film, making it more boring than better.\u00a0 All that’s left is the fighting, and even that gets bungled.<\/p>\n

Most of Chan’s opponents are huge musclemen, very strong but very slow.\u00a0 Chan essentially runs circles around them, and in classic comic fashion.\u00a0 And when I say classic, I mean very classic.\u00a0 Think Three Stooges<\/strong> and Buster Keaton<\/strong> meets Speedy Gonz\u00e1les <\/strong>(also from Warner Bros.<\/em>) and you’ll have a clue what I mean.\u00a0 Almost all of the fights feature a frustratingly awkward slowness on the one side, and a ridiculous speed (if somewhat reserved at times) on the other.\u00a0 It can get painful to watch at times.<\/p>\n

So how much you enjoy this film, set in the 1930s but featuring a 70s-style roller derby, will depend greatly on how you can handle the Three Stooges<\/strong> and, well, Jackie Chan<\/strong> on a bad day.<\/p>\n

[HOW BAD-ASS IS THE MAIN CHARACTER?]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Jackie Chan<\/strong> is Jerry Kwan<\/span><\/h3>\n

Chan plays Kwan as a sort of happy-go-lucky guy, as he normally plays his characters, with little flare other than his relationship with Kirsten DeBell’s character.\u00a0 He’s sort of a goofball, but is being trained by his uncle, Mako<\/strong>, (yeah, I know he’s Japanese, but whatever) to become a bad-ass.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Jerry’s not about being strong, but instead, a sort of durable, speeding, rollerskating kick-artist.\u00a0 It works when he’s fighting, but nothing about him is intimidating to even the weakest of the goons whom he opposes.\u00a0 Bad-ass or not?\u00a0 I’d say not.<\/p>\n

[THE BODY COUNT: 1]
\n<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

Jackie’s fiercest opponent, to give you another idea of the tone of this film, is a guy called Billy Kiss.\u00a0 This is apparently a nick-name, because Billy likes to kiss his opponents after beating them and hugging them to submission.\u00a0 One hug goes too far and kills a guy, and it’s mentioned that this has happened in the past.<\/p>\n

Still, that’s one kill.<\/p>\n

[MOST SATISFYING ASS-KICKING]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

Though I enjoy the end fight between Jerry and Billy Kiss, I enjoy the fight in the theater much more.\u00a0 Jackie is finally able to let loose, and with lightning speed, takes out several 30s goons with his Mako-trained kung fu skills.\u00a0 It borders on Bruce Lee imitation, but it’s still pretty cool.<\/p>\n

[DUDESWEAT AND MACHISMO]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

It’s about as gay as a film can be that begins and ends with a man kissing another man.\u00a0 As I mentioned above, the fiercest enemy in this film is a huge guy who hugs and kisses his opponents.\u00a0 If that’s not enough for you, then this film also features more bears than a zoo, but with way less clothing.\u00a0 Prepare for a lot of man-meat when watching this one, folks.\u00a0 And bring a handkerchief.<\/p>\n

[EXPLOITATION AND MISOGYNY]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

The women in this film are completely there for the sake of it.\u00a0 They are sexual objects and pawns, providing very little to the story.\u00a0 Sure, the whole point of Jackie entering in the fight contest is to get his brother’s MAIL-ORDER BRIDE back, but once the fight is over, so is the movie.\u00a0 Do they get her back?\u00a0 No one cares.<\/p>\n

[EPIC MOMENT AND BEST ONE-LINER]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

My favorite moment is the chase scene between Billy Kiss and Jerry Kwan.\u00a0 Billy chases Jerry through a crowd of fight spectators, with Kwan cartoonishly popping up in different disguises throughout.\u00a0 This is all done in a single crane shot, showcasing Jackie Chan’s incredible speed.\u00a0 Just try following him!<\/p>\n

[flashvideo filename=videos\/BigBrawlFunny.wmv.FLV \/]<\/p>\n

My favorite line actually belongs to this old, batty lady that’s in the film for only a couple scenes.\u00a0 Still, she’s so goofy that she winds up being hilarious.\u00a0 One 30s gangster, talking about how he could find Chan’s character, get this retort from grandma:<\/p>\n

“You couldn’t find a whore on Russ Street.”<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

[THE MORAL OF THE STORY]<\/strong><\/span><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h2>\n

Speed beats power.\u00a0 And don’t feed the bears.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

[THE GIST OF JACKIE: 5 outta 5]<\/strong><\/span><\/h2>\n

[X] Breaks Into Someplace Or Escapes By Way Of Acrobatics
\n[X] Has An Annoying Tag-Along Companion
\n[X] Makes The ‘OW!’ Face And\/Or Rubs A Soar Spot
\n[X] Performs A Ridiculously Dangerous Stunt
\n[X] Uses A Random Object To Defend Himself
\n<\/strong><\/strong><\/h3>\n

[THE CHECKLIST: 10 outta 25]<\/span><\/h2>\n

[X] Athlete(s) Turned \u201cActor\u201d
\n[\u00a0 ] Clinging To The Outside Of A Moving Vehicle
\n[X] Crotch Attack
\n[X] Dialogue Telling Us How Bad-Ass The Main Character(s) Is\/Are
\n[\u00a0 ] Ending Featuring An Ambulance, A Blanket or A Towel
\n[X] Factory\/Warehouse
\n[\u00a0 ] Giant Explosion(s)
\n[\u00a0 ] Heavy Artillery
\n[X] Improvised Weapon(s)
\n[\u00a0 ] Macho Mode(s) Of Transportation
\n[\u00a0 ] Main Character Sports Facial Accessory(s)
\n[X] Manly Embrace(s)
\n[X] Notorious Stunt-Man Sighting [Jackie Chan]
\n[X] Passage(s) Of Time Via Montage
\n[\u00a0 ] Politically Fueled Plot Point(s)
\n[X] Senseless Destruction Of Property
\n[\u00a0 ] Shoot Out(s) and\/or Sword Fight(s)
\n[\u00a0 ] Slow-Motion Finishing Move(s)\/Death(s)
\n[\u00a0 ] Stupid Authoritative Figure(s)
\n[X] Substance Usage and\/or Abuse
\n[\u00a0 ] Tis The Season
\n[\u00a0 ] Torture Sequence(s)
\n[\u00a0 ] Unnecessary Sequel
\n[\u00a0 ] Vehicle Chase(s)
\n[\u00a0 ] Vigilante Justice<\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/strong><\/h3>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Battle Creek Bear Hug<\/span><\/h1>\n

The Big Brawl \u00a9 Warner Bros., Golden Harvest & 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[THE CHALK-OUTLINE] The Big Brawl a.k.a. Battle Creek Brawl (1980): Breakdown by Kain424 In an alternate 1930s America, where Chinese men can become wealthy doctors and date Caucasian women without it causing a stir, Jackie Chan must enter a fighting tournament to win back his brother’s kidnapped mail-order wife.\u00a0 Also, there’s a roller derby for … Read moreBattle Creek Bore<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1300","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-reviews"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1300","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1300"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1300\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1300"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1300"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/allouttabubblegum.com\/new-home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1300"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}